Exactly one month ago today, I was in Chicago, in a hotel room, with one person who I had met a few times before and two others who I talked to (A WHOLE FUCKING LOT) every day but who I had never met in person.
Was it awkward? Were we shy?
Did we immediately bond over a gianormous margarita?
Well, fuck, yeah.
The first day:
As I had stayed at Lisa's house the night before (ostensibly so we could leave early and get to Chicago in time to pick up Jami and Shannon) I was awakened at the crack of dawn by Lisa. She would not let me shower. Nor eat. Nor do anything besides get my ass in her car so we could RUSH, RUSH, RUSH to Chicago.
As so I went.
Four and half hours and two three McDonald's stops later, we arrive at O'Hare to pick up the Jami from Miami. And we wait. And wait. And wait some more. At this point, I had to pee. Lisa tried to convince me that using the porta-potty was an excellent idea. I begged to differ.
Then Lisa had an epiphany. AHA! No wonder Jami hadn't landed yet! The lovely city of Chicago is IN CENTRAL TIME. We were a whole fucking hour early. I could have used that hour to SLEEP. Or maybe to shower.
Rocket scientists we are not.
FINALLY, Jami emails to say she has landed. We pick her up and crawl back to downtown Chicago. The traffic there is a complete nightmare. We then try and find Shannon, who is waiting for us at Union Station. We circle. And swear. And drive some more. Finally we drive down the right street and pick up Shanny.
HUZZAH! We are all together!
We don't need no stinking GPS. Success, it is ours!
Until we realized that we had no idea how to get to the hotel.
WACKER? EAST? WEST? LOWER? UPPER!! Why are there so many streets called Wacker in Chicago?
(I don't know, you brought her.)
Fast forward 30 minutes and we find the hotel. We unpack the car and head to our room. It was around then that the endless phone calls from my mother began.
(What?? You didn't know my mother and her friends were going to be in Chicago too while we were there? NOTE TO SELF: Do not ever plan fun weekend with friends whilst mother is in near vicinity because the constant phone calls and pleas to GO TO MORTON'S FOR SOME STEAK, DON'T YOU WANT STEAK? will only make you feel like a shithead and ruin your drunky fun.)
So, we head downstairs at the OH SO LOVEY SHERATON and have dinner and then head over to my mom's hotel for some sweet, sweet alcohol with my mom and her friends. Wanna talk about wild? LET ME SHOW YOU THE WILD.
*That's Jami's top shelf dirty martini there. She had a very stern convo with the waitress to make sure that the drink was to her EXACT specifications. She's so discerning. (coughcoughandbossycough)
Don't I look awesome in this pic. I mean my chin, it is fabulous. I was totally going to try and feel Jami up, but then she moved.
So I moved onto Lisa.
This is the mothership. Remember how I say I NEVER can take a decent pic? Guess where I got that from?
Of course, then I had to drag these drunky asses back to the hotel. Okay, I really had to get away from my mom. But then I went to the bathroom and came out to find this little lovefest going on.
The next morning, Shannon ditched us to attend her Blogher! sessions!, so we got sucked into going to xx for Greek food in Greektown and then shopping along Michigan Ave. With my mom. Whee!