Too Fabulous for Words

The Littlest Epicurean

The Catholic School Board here has an evil plan designed to break a parent's spirit with one little day a month. It's called a professional development day and it's always on a Wednesday, which as some of you may know is smack dab in the middle of the week. The teachers spend the day eating a catered lunch and discussing "work" which we all know means who is the assiest in each of their classes. Meanwhile the kids have the day off which means that we, the parents need to come up with some sort of entertainment for the day.

Which is how I found myself at Dave & Buster's or The Casino for Kids in Buffalo on Wednesday. Have you ever been? No? Well, don't go then. Count yourself lucky. Because it happens to be a) Loud b) Expensive c) Has really good food. Really. Lordy, we must have blown $200 there that day and that didn't include our lunch. But the kids had fun and I found myself addicted to the shiny shiny machines where you drop coins in and hope that it ends up pushing other stacked coins over the ledge. If they offered those in the casino I'd be so in debt.

Yesterday I did fuck all because the baby, she no sleepy. So I lounged on the couch and DID NOT PUT THE BABY DOWN because she has a cold and THE PUTTING DOWN IS NOT ACCEPTABLE, MOTHER.

I started making homemade pierogies yesterday and by 6:30 pm, everyone else had broken down and eaten hot dogs because I still wasn't finished. The ironic thing was that I had the dough and filling prepared in advance. Mis en place, my ass. By 7:30 I was finally finished, disgusted and exhausted so I just put them into the freezer and went to bed. Time management? Where art thou?

The aforementioned baby has been eating cereal for a while now and I've been introducing fruits and veggies to her along the way. She is always hungry the moment I go to eat, so I usually am holding her while at the dinner table. I've been mashing up our food and giving her tiny tastes and now she is starting to hold her nose up at mere baby cereal. She loves broccoli and hummus and cheesey potatoes and zucchini, though, so I'm thinking she's going to be another fab eater like her brother and sister. And NOT like her older brother who exists on hamburgers, fries, pickles and chicken fingers. Oh, and bread.

What's for dinner tonight, Kimber?

Fuck if I know. All I know is I'm not cooking.

Stupid pierogies.

Up next: A wee diatribe about old folks.

Mr. Barky Von Schnauzer*

We had the most fabulous weekend. The weather was absolutely gorgy, clear blue skies and it was warm, warm, warm. I took the baby for two walks and she was just agog as she gazed around. You could totally see her little brain working. Where is this place? This isn't my house! She just couldn't get over the trees! The birds! The sun!

The kids spent both days outside, only coming in to eat and wash their hands. Because dirt is fun, Mom.

You know that pet food commercial where the dorky guy comes home from work and calls his dog enthusiastically, "Mr. Barky von Schnauzer!" and the dog doesn't come? Supposedly because the guy gave him such a lameass name? There is this one cheap channel here that plays that commercial over and over and now I've taken to calling Lily Cat, Miss Meowy von Furball. I hate this commercial so much that I had to go and Google it. And I found 670 sites. Who knew? And, if this website is to be believed, this guy tried out for the part of dorky guy and it's the funniest thing I've read, well, today.

*For all you mad Googlers (Googlites?) who came here via your search for Mr. Barky von Schnauzer, can you tell me WHY? DID? YOU? SEARCH? FOR? MR. BARKY VON SCHNAUZER? I know why I did it (I'm weird like that?) But why did YOU?

Did y'all know that Jessica Simpson has a line of faux hair buns? No, seriously. I was flipping through the guide on the satellite and couldn't stop from flicking on HSN when I saw that the show was about Jessica Simpson's Updo.All I gotta say is...I bought three. Anything with Jerssica Simpson's name on it has got to be good! No, actually I want to know one thing...WHY?

What's for dinner, Kimber?

Asian Beef Skewers

2-3 largish beef tenderloins or a thick cut sirloin
bamboo skewers

Slice the beef into thin slices. I usually pop the steak into the freezer for 15 minutes to firm up the beef a bit.

Marinade
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup rice vinegar
2 tbsp. olive oil
1/4 cup soy sauce
dash Worcestershire
2 cloves of garlic smashed
I lime zested and juiced

Mix together and marinate the steak strips for at least an hour. I usually stick mine in a resealable plastic bag, but today I am using Gladware.

Remove from marinade and thread onto skewers. Barbecue on medium for 3-4 minutes per side.

I serve with fried rice and steamed broccoli.Yummy!

Two posts in one day! Take that, dudes.

New Toofies

Emmersen is getting her bottom toofies in and today I finally got a piccie of them. (She totally likes to hide them with her tongue.) They are super cute, but verrrrrrry sharp. My poor boobie can testify to its pointyness.

You most click to enlarge otherwise you'll miss the messiness that is the cuteness.

And So It's Thursday

Guess what? The sun is out! Whooot! For like the 1st time in weeks. WEEEEEKS. It's so very exciting. I can wear my sunglasses and contemplate going on a walk. A walk with my lovely spendy stroller that's been used like 6 times since the baby was born. Hmmmm...

Nah. I'll just continue to sit here and watch the extremely lame plot line on Days of Our Lives. I mean really. Does Sami really think that she can kill E.J.-with-the-weirdass-elfin-ears with poison lipstick? AGGH. Who writes this shit?

OKAY, must I bring up Sanjaya? Because it seems everyone else is. But I am so over him. I was weeks ago, when I threw my shoe at the TV screen and railed against the teenage idiots texting him in to win. The husband got quite sick of me sneaking around the house shouting "Sanjaya!" like the nimble ninja chick that I think I am.

Oh my God, my house is such a disaster. Since we have had zero sunshine around here, I've been turning a blind eye to the dust motes and kids' stuff all over the place. Why do my kids have so much stuff? Stuff everywhere! Clay stuff, book stuff, socks stuff, loads and loads of stuff. And I really do pick up everyday, but it seems every morning I come downstairs and there's more crap on my coffeetable/dining room table/kitchen counters.

I've got my chicken marinating happily away in the fridge for dinner (recipe below) but I don't know what to have with it. Baked potatoes? Rice? BAH. I hate making dinner sometimes. Especially now when I'm so distracted by the sunny sun and the light bouncing off my dusty windows.

Okay, must motivate self to slide off couch and tidy this place up before the bebe wakes up. Because she's craawling now, y'all and when I put her down now she's under the table in 3 seconds eating as many dustballs as she can stuff in her face before I manage to catch her. She's cute like that.

Delish Lime Chicken

4 chicken breasts

Marinade
2 limes
4 tsp. chopped garlic
2 tsp. soy sauce
3 tsp. paprika
2 tsp. black pepper
1/2 tsp. kosher salt

Throw in plastic food storage bag and marinate for at least an hour. Grill or use a grill pan for about 6-7 minutes per side.

Success is the Ability to Change Out of Your Yoga Pants

Today, I am going out to lunch. With grown-ups! And wine! And possibly Thai food! Or maybe Indian! It hasn't been decided yet! All I care about is the wine part. And the fact that I'll be wearing big girl clothes. Clothes that match and are not covered in cat fur! Because I'm going out to lunch!

Huzzah!

I know y'all are like, sooooo what? I eat lunch everyday. But for me, stuck in this bloody house watching snow, snow and more snow come down with a 7 month old baby, albeit a very cute one, has been really depressing. I can not wait for nice weather. Sunshine and lollipos and all that jazz.

Today lunch out with the girls! Tomorrow? Maybe I'll give my husband some much needed attention! Whoo-hoo!

Oh, God, Let's Not Rehash This Again

Did anyone see that reality show on PBS a few years ago about those weird families that chose (!!) to go off and live in some peasant village and live off the land, wear really scratchy clothing, have candles as their only source of light, behead their own chickens and basically look really filthy and uh, non-deodorized?

No? Well, that is how my life has been the past 6 weeks. Minus the dirt, scratchy clothing, chickens and growing my own veggies. WHY, you gasp? because my stupid power cord for my iBook decided to become really frazzled and send little wires outside of the pretty white covering thereby rendering it USELESS and then your 11 year old son plays World of Freakin' Warcraft on your laptop and doesn't inform you about the little wiring problem and let's the computer slowly die into oblivion.

GAHHHH!

So after much crying and wailing, I ordered another one from eBay not realizing that it was coming from a far away land that may rhyme with Dina and it was sent on a very slow and slightly sinking rowboat therefore making me wait weeeeeks to receive it.

Anyway.

Let's talk about You.

No? Fine. We'll talk about mememememeeeee.

The baby is now 7 months old. I am now 36 years old. My birthday was...uhm...meh. I am looking at YOU and YOU and YOU, you know the people who didn't send a card. My very own BFF in Florida didn't even call. How bad must I stink? HUH? Tell me! Anyway, I am OVER IT and the next day was Easter, a day of chocolate cream eggs and babies wearing bunny ears.

Easter morning.

On the way to Granmum and Grandad's house for some sweet, sweet dinner.

Hangin' with her cousin. He is 5 weeks older than Em. Bored yet? I know they are...

So y'all must be asking yourselves what, pray tell, have I been doing whilst my computer has been dead. Well, I tell you...Besides getting facials and being massaged by men named Sven, I've been catching up on ALL the reality TV drama. I've been watching The Hills (Dear Lord), Top Design, Work Out (lurve it), Driving Force, Family Jewels (Who knew Gene Simmons was so funny?) and godhelpme I've started watching the trainwreck of The Sons of Hollywood.

That's me! A reality show junkie. But can you blame me? Is there anything else on TV besides CSI, Law & Order and reality TV? Oh! I've also read about 312 books because a brain is a terrible thing to waste. The baby is now on a holding pattern of sleeping for about 3 hours in the afternoon and really, who wants to do laundry and clean the catbox?

uhm, what else? OH! Yes, it seems that ever since March 31, I am now the proud parent of an 18 year old. AGGH! I know! Could I possibly feel any older? Not that he acts like it, mind. No, he still needs to be reminded to fix his hair, change his socks, pick up his socks and DO HIS HOMEWORK. But he is now allowed to do more adultish things like stay out later and go to really questionable concerts downtown. In May he's flying out to stay with my mom and WHOOO-BOY, now he'll see that really, I am not so bad in the motherhood dept. All I gotta say is good luck, buddy.

Heh.

Oh, yeccch. I must now go and clean my kitchen because the husbando will be home soon and I really have to make it look like I did Something today. Really, I do try.

Hey, y'all go say Happy Birthday to Cheryl today. It's her (cough-cough close to fourty b-day) and although she's never online, she still need to feel the love.