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  • Website: https://kimberleyschmahl.com

Biography

1. I'm American.
2. I live in Canada, though.
3. I live really close to the border.
4. Apparently, I'm a landed immigrant.
5. I'm an only child. I think it is quite unfair.
6. Some may call me spoiled.
7. To them I say, Piss Off.
8. I adore shopping. (really, really, really.)
9. I also like sex, wine and videotapes of Colin Firth. (okay, DVD's-sheesh you people)
10. I have two cats.
11. They aren't all named after plants. (They used to be, and then they died.)
12. I have four kids.
13. They are not named after plants.
14. They do have names that might mistake me for a Family Ties fan.
15. I am so not.
16. I have one husband, but I like to pretend I have three. (I call them Larry, Curly and Moe.)
17. I believe in the power of three, obviously.
18. It's something one of my old English teachers harped on.
19. I have a love of good spelling and grammar.
20. My mom was an English major.
21. She thought I should have been a doctor.
22. I ended up being a writer.
23. She still thinks I'm going back to school for a medical degree.
24. She may be senile.
25. I have a very dry sense of humor.
26. I love witty people.
27. Some people think I'm sarcastic.
28. To them I say, Piss Off.
29. I'm actually quite shy.
30. Really.
31. My first job was at Macys.
32. I worked in all the departments.
33. My fave was the electronics dept.
34. I met my first boyfriend there.
35. He was quite funny.
36. I met my husband in a mall, too.
37. I think it's a pretty lame way to meet someone.
38. C'est la vie.
39. I took one year of French and five years of Spanish.
40. El banano es muy pequeno.
41. I swear silently a lot. And out loud even more.
42. I've never been in an accident or gotten a ticket.
43. I always wear my seatbelt.
44. I don't smoke.
45. My best friend in college and I used to buy them when we went out and just hold them. We are still very lame.
46. Both my father and my fave auntie died from smoking.
47. I hate bugs.
48. I love being near the ocean.
49. I used to be on the swim team. I still swim a lot.
50. I consider seafood to be bugs living in the ocean.
51. I think heavy metal music is passe.
52. Funnily enough, my oldest son loves KISS.
53. ewww.
54. I never did like acid wash jeans and make-up on men. Or "hair" bands.
55. I'm all for equality in marriage.
56. And I don't mean men doing the laundry, either.
57. I'm quite liberal.
58. And I don't care.
59. I like to cook. A lot.
60. I also like bacon.
61. Suck on that.